“Sometimes, perceived absence of His presence is also a sign of His deeper revelation because once you do realize that He was not absent after all, His grace crashes in like waves.”—My brother (from my birthday card)
Tonight, I am blown away by the realization that whenever I approach God in prayer, He never fails to meet me. Regardless of the state of my heart, He comes, and He touches. Just the level of intimacy achieved through that act… amazes me so much. Prayer is not just me rambling to someone who may or may not be listening. He is real and present, and so much closer than I believe sometimes. Through prayer, I am interacting with the One who created me, in a way that is familiar only to me. My heart feels so full, and I am left wondering why it took so long for me to realize this.
There is a longing in my heart to make prayer a lifestyle, rather than a last resort. How awesome would it be, if I could engage in this type of unique and intimate interaction with God every single day?
I can’t imagine just how much. But I imagine it to be pretty awesome at the least.
It’s Christmas morning! Did you open any presents yet? :)
Thank you all so much for keeping up with this blog and taking the time to read the content here. It has been a wonderful and exciting journey thus far, and I look forward to sharing more content that is engaging and interesting!
Recently, I shared about some very dark times of my life with not even a hint of bitterness or pain in my heart. I spoke about it sincerely and gravely, but all the negative emotions associated with it were not present.
I remember praying desperately through tears for healing not very long ago. I remember when I decided to finally put my foot down and forgive, and love in place of feeling bitter. I also remember a tiny part of my heart wondering if these things will ever happen.
Sometimes the Lord works so quietly and gently that it takes some time for me to notice. Delicate matters require delicate handling, and God knows that. But the results are powerful and apparent.
My brain tells me that God is near. In my head, I am certain that the Lord has a plan for me and my life, and that He has not left me to fend for myself. My mind accepts these as truths, yet my heart refuses to believe them. Since when have I become so numb? My Father did not design me to feel disconnected from Him. It is time for a change of heart.
There are a few things I keep forgetting to bring from home: card stock paper, winter jacket, scarves, slr camera.
I am thankful for the people around me who challenge me in ways that force me to act out of my comfort zone. I feel so blessed because I know that it is God working in me through these people. It encourages and motivates me to be a similar kind of vessel to others.
Feeling so, so blessed. Things have been hard lately, with med schools being silent on admissions decisions, and planning for alternatives, and thinking of all the uncertainties of the near future, but… I don’t know. I’ve been studying all week while trying to ward off this cold and juggling extracurriculars. Today of all days, I am reminded of the blessings in my life. So humbled. A daily habit in the making.
Today, for the first time ever, I thought about giving up. During these past 3 years, even in my lowest moments, even in the days until today, giving up wasn’t even an option. Not even an ounce of motivation left in me anymore. Well, maybe there is an ounce left. Maybe a little less. Or more. I don’t know.
Before I dive in to the updates, I would first like to thank all readers of this blog,subscribed and unsubscribed, for taking the time to visit Tea for Shoe and looking through the content I have published here. I really do appreciate every single…
I am thankful for my mama who packs me chocolate to keep me energized throughout the day and a blanket to keep me warm in the library.
I am thankful for my daddy who sends me wonderful emails filled with lovely and encouraging words that make me cry tears of happiness.
I am thankful for my brother who, despite his weird work schedule, helped me revise my lengthy and wordy personal statement.
I am thankful for my lab partners who make culturing cells a lot less boring and help make the hours go by faster with their goofiness (and for my P.I. for always being so patient with us even when we make mistakes and throw out the DNA…).
I am thankful for my handsome and beautiful friends who reach out to me and pray for me and provide comic relief during the unnecessarily serious times of my life.
I am thankful for my ever so supportive boyfriend who makes the hour long commute down to eat burgers and fries with me (and gives me his sweatshirt when I get cold, even if it means he has to be cold).