Golden rays of light streaming in through delicate, white curtains, I lay out on the faded green sofa, the leather cool underneath my skin Close my eyes, I listen to the noises of outside, just beyond the walls that separate hardwood floors from green grass and soil Unaware of all things that are to come, to happen, I let my mind wonder Where will I go? What will I do? Who will I meet? When will be the next sunshower? I roll over onto my side, the warm breeze brushes against my body I drift off into sleep.
It is so unbelievably sunny outside that if my window didn’t shake from the wind (and if I haven’t ventured outside already), I would be easily convinced that it is super warm as well.
I’ve been feeling really overwhelmed this past week. So many deadlines and different things going on that I could’ve easily become really lost without my planner to help me stay on top of everything. Sadly, the week isn’t over for me yet. :(
Also, this morning, I reached a small milestone during my workout and it gave me a significant boost in my confidence. I am making progress! It’s been so difficult getting back into working out 5-6 times a week, but I’m really glad that I started. Initially, I started exercising to get in shape for spring break, but now, I want fitness to be an important part of my life. I also feel a greater sense of urgency about getting a new pair of running shoes. I’ve had mine for 8 years now… and I’m beginning to feel discomfort in my left ankle. Not good at all.
Overall, everything has been such a blur. I feel like I have no time to stop and process things as they happen. Everything has been happening too quickly! I wish I could slow it all down.
“Sometimes, perceived absence of His presence is also a sign of His deeper revelation because once you do realize that He was not absent after all, His grace crashes in like waves.”—My brother (from my birthday card)
Tonight, I am blown away by the realization that whenever I approach God in prayer, He never fails to meet me. Regardless of the state of my heart, He comes, and He touches. Just the level of intimacy achieved through that act… amazes me so much. Prayer is not just me rambling to someone who may or may not be listening. He is real and present, and so much closer than I believe sometimes. Through prayer, I am interacting with the One who created me, in a way that is familiar only to me. My heart feels so full, and I am left wondering why it took so long for me to realize this.
There is a longing in my heart to make prayer a lifestyle, rather than a last resort. How awesome would it be, if I could engage in this type of unique and intimate interaction with God every single day?
I can’t imagine just how much. But I imagine it to be pretty awesome at the least.
It’s Christmas morning! Did you open any presents yet? :)
Thank you all so much for keeping up with this blog and taking the time to read the content here. It has been a wonderful and exciting journey thus far, and I look forward to sharing more content that is engaging and interesting!
Recently, I shared about some very dark times of my life with not even a hint of bitterness or pain in my heart. I spoke about it sincerely and gravely, but all the negative emotions associated with it were not present.
I remember praying desperately through tears for healing not very long ago. I remember when I decided to finally put my foot down and forgive, and love in place of feeling bitter. I also remember a tiny part of my heart wondering if these things will ever happen.
Sometimes the Lord works so quietly and gently that it takes some time for me to notice. Delicate matters require delicate handling, and God knows that. But the results are powerful and apparent.
My brain tells me that God is near. In my head, I am certain that the Lord has a plan for me and my life, and that He has not left me to fend for myself. My mind accepts these as truths, yet my heart refuses to believe them. Since when have I become so numb? My Father did not design me to feel disconnected from Him. It is time for a change of heart.
There are a few things I keep forgetting to bring from home: card stock paper, winter jacket, scarves, slr camera.
I am thankful for the people around me who challenge me in ways that force me to act out of my comfort zone. I feel so blessed because I know that it is God working in me through these people. It encourages and motivates me to be a similar kind of vessel to others.
Feeling so, so blessed. Things have been hard lately, with med schools being silent on admissions decisions, and planning for alternatives, and thinking of all the uncertainties of the near future, but… I don’t know. I’ve been studying all week while trying to ward off this cold and juggling extracurriculars. Today of all days, I am reminded of the blessings in my life. So humbled. A daily habit in the making.
Today, for the first time ever, I thought about giving up. During these past 3 years, even in my lowest moments, even in the days until today, giving up wasn’t even an option. Not even an ounce of motivation left in me anymore. Well, maybe there is an ounce left. Maybe a little less. Or more. I don’t know.
Before I dive in to the updates, I would first like to thank all readers of this blog,subscribed and unsubscribed, for taking the time to visit Tea for Shoe and looking through the content I have published here. I really do appreciate every single…